Always
by barricaded
Summary: Memories Lily recalls of Severus, and his dying moments. One-shot thing or whatever.


"_Lily, you're beautiful."_

_Those words froze me for a moment. Severus was the last person I had expected to hear that from. I had been gathering my potions equipment when he came up and told me that. Once realisation of what he said finally hit, my cheeks reddened._

"_Thanks..?" the word came out as a question due to my sudden confusion and my own self-doubt. I surely thought it was a joke._

_Pain briefly flashed across his features. "You make it sound like I said a bad thing.."_

"_N-no..!" I quickly spoke to amend my mistake. " I was just caught by surprise, is all. I rarely get such comments. Thank you, Severus." I embraced him tightly, pressing my lips lightly against his throat. _

_We had been childhood friends. The odd two that just happened to do everything together. I would never admit it aloud, but recently I had been hoping for more than just that familiar friendship with him._

_I loved Severus Snape._

James startled me from my thoughts with a soft kiss on my lips. "What's on your mind, Miss Evans? Our future wedding?"

I almost missed his questions. Almost all of my attention was focused on the tingling feeling his fingers were leaving behind on my sides, my stomach, my chest. It took me a moment to even process that he was saying anything besides the normal murmurs of love.

"I was just thinking of how excited I am that we are getting a place of our own soon.." I quickly lied to make him feel better. I then pressed my lips to his so he couldn't ask me anything more.

Even as James deepened the kiss, I couldn't fully pull my mind away from Severus. It seemed like he rarely left my mind. Despite all the years we had been apart, I still couldn't help put be completely in love with him.

And all it took to poison that love was a simple word.

"_Mudblood," the word almost easily fell from Severus' lips. It knocked me back a few steps with the force of the meaning behind it._

_Reality came crashing down upon me harder than anything else. I was a mudblood. I was the muggle-born Gryffindor girl. He was the pureblood Slytherin. We weren't meant to even be together. _

"_How could you..? I thought we left prejudices behind.. I was wrong about you!" Tears welled up in my eyes, and I couldn't stand to even look in his direction anymore. I didn't want to see the regret I knew was already in his eyes._

"_Lily! I..I didn't mean that! I swear.. I'm so sorry.. Please, I didn't mean it at all.. I love you."_

_The words stung more than the name he used. No, we couldn't be together anymore. My mind was already made up. I hated the thought that we did, in fact, love each other. The thought that I had to give that up. "Severus, we weren't meant to be together. We're both completely different. We never should have been."_

"_Lily.. I love you. None of that used to matter. What changed now?"_

"_Reality. We cannot go on living this life. It wasn't meant to be."_

_He reached out for me, but didn't actually touch me. He attempted to speak a few times, but nothing ever came from his mouth._

"_We need someone more like ourselves.. I still love you though. Always. But we'll be happier with others."_

_After a quick kiss, I walked off._

_I went to James simply to hurt Severus as he hurt me. It was well-known that the two hated each other. I was his perfect Gryffindor girlfriend, though I had never truly wanted it to last. I didn't care for him._

_After we left Hogwarts, we stayed together. I simply didn't know how to change what already was, so I didn't bother trying. It was what it was. Never to be with my beloved for as long as I lived. Always living a lie._

"I will still love you. Always."

Those words constantly played in Severus' mind. They're what kept him going from day-to-day. Those words are what brought him to working secretly for the greatest wizard of all, Albus Dumbledore, to bring down the Dark Lord. He needed to avenge her death.

Now it had brought him here. The Dark Lord was before him, talking of the Elder Wand which was technically mine. Albus was dead, Lily was dead, and soon Harry would be sacrificed for the sake of the wizarding world.

This was my last task. I was to be killed for the wand so the Dark Lord could kill Harry. He knew that Harry himself was lurking, watching his certain death.

And those words were ringing through his head.

He no longer cared what was being said. He could only hear Lily's voice- could only see her beautiful face. His mind barely noticed that the Dark Lord had begun speaking in Parseltongue to his snake.

Then Nagini was upon him. There was a terrible, violent pain ripping through his body, but he was numb to it. He was numb to anything but her perfect green eyes.

More Parseltongue. Master and snake left to finish off their deeds. A soft tread was heard upon the floor, and I could see those green eyes again.

The face wasn't right. It wasn't her. It was her son, who so strikingly resembled the man he desperately hated.

He no longer cared about that hatred. He gasped out but a few brief words, "Take.. it.. Take.. it.."

The boy caught the last few memories that leaked from Severus Snape.

"Look at me.." the man whispered, but he was gone before he could finish the sentence.

"_I will still love you. Always."_


End file.
